Scribble@Work

a terrible month for writing.

Sorry to the people in the writing project... my mind's been elsewhere.

now I look back on August and realize, before I was uncomfortable; now i'm upset.

I need to get an apartment.

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did so. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover"

Mark Twain said that. It makes me think that I should keep a list of things I want to do before I die.

Things like, fly a plane, jump out of a plane, see the northern lights, break or set a world record, and publish a book, to name a few.

I think it would be great to have those memories...

but then I think, will I even care the day I die? Assuming I live to an old age, will I look back on my life and think to myself, "I'm happy. I am happy with the way things happened." Or will I simply not care?

I have a lot on my mind that last week, but I haven't been able to write most of it.

I haven't been able to write almost anything the past week. I got chapter 5 from Dan for the project, so I will be working on that, and I worked a little bit on Kid Awesome today, but it seems really hard. I find myself wanting nothing more than to write, and finish both of these stories so I will be able to work on getting them published, but I can't get the ideas to flow right now.

I just saw a movie called "Young People Fucking" and it's become one of my new favorite movies. I'm assuming you haven't heard of it, which isn't surprising. It's a canadian film that was almost never advertised here in the states. Well, I think it was just written exceptionally. My favorite set in the movie is the "friends" group. For them, "Orgasm" and "Afterglow" make the movie amazing to me, but also they are good the entire movie; my least favorite group is the "first date" group. I don't know why... I think it's the Wine Cooler addition.

Other than that funny movie, my writer's wall and the continuing awkwardness here at my new abode, life is alright. In a few weeks I'm getting a new car, since mine was taken away. Shortly after that I'll be moving again, this time for good to a new apartment.

I don't know what else to say, so I'll end with a great quote from YPF:

"sometimes it's something... sometimes it's meaningful, sometimes it's carressing faces and fingers intertwined and whispering little secrets in ears... and sometimes a fuck is just a fuck. It's grinding your shit and emptying your balls and falling alseep right after you cum and that's what you and I are gonna do to one another because that's what friends are for so stop fucking up the gameplan, down that shot because right after that your old buddy Chris is gonna blow you"

just gonna sum up some stuff... later this week.

It's weird living here. This is my fourth night here and it's getting a little better, but this will never be home.

i'm used to visiting here for two to three days. Now I live here. I know everyone here knows I live here, but I don't think it's really sunk in for any of us yet.

When I came here to visit, I would stay the entire time and only go out if my dad was going somewhere and I wanted to go along for the ride... now I live here, and I am an adult, so I can come and go as I please for the most part... but I am like nervous to do so. I am not stuck here in Mongtomery county; If I want to see a friend, I can drive down to Deleware County and see them, I'm just nervous... and I don't really know why.

I can kinda sense that my dad and step mom are feeling the same way.

part two tomorrow; i'm tired.

I was working out in my room the other day. Sit ups, push ups, and pull ups. Simple stuff. well apparenlty I was making a bunch of noise on the floor.

I went downstairs to get my girlfriend a drink and my mom said, quite angrily, "What's all the fucking noise?" I explained. She said, "Well stop. I'm not having all that noise over my head."

I said ok, i'd stop.

For whatever reason (she was fucking drunk) she told me again. I agreed.

She told me again; I ignored her.

She told me again; I told her to shut up.

She then punched me in the back and started yelling at me. So i threw the drink at her and i walked away. I chose to throw my drink. I had three options in my mind. Throw the drink, Punch the bitch in the face, or punch through the wall again.

After I walked away she told me to pack and get out, so i did, expecting to be back the next day. Nope, I'm not allowed back

I now live 60 miles away from that house... 60 miles away from my friends and most importantly from my girlfriend.

I FUCKING HATE LIFE.

my mother
the drunken things she says and does
all the feelings i have because of her
living under the same roof as her
getting kicked out for stupid stupid shit
that shes losing her mind.

Email me for it.
Disgracerpg@gmail.com will do the trick.

Not to spoil anything, but Chapter Two really moves the story along and I think ends on a note that will make you beg for Chapter Three :-D... ok, that was a little cocky, but I deserve to be cocky, I'm finally enjoying my writing.

I progressed the story. Something I never do, the single biggest problem I have.

I always try to keep the important parts of the story until much later. The first few chapters, to me, are not supposed to reveal much.

Well, i don't want to do that. I just want to finish this story. After that, well maybe I can add details and subplots and shit like that. first i just need to fucking write something.